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๐—ฌ๐—ผ๐˜‚๐—ฟ ๐—ก๐—ฒ๐˜„ ๐—ข๐—ป๐—ฏ๐—ผ๐—ฎ๐—ฟ๐—ฑ ๐—ง๐—ผ๐—ฎ๐˜€๐˜๐—ฒ๐—ฟ ๐—ข๐˜ƒ๐—ฒ๐—ป

๐˜ฃ๐˜บ ๐˜ˆ๐˜ฏ๐˜จ๐˜ฆ๐˜ญ๐˜ข ๐˜ˆ๐˜ค๐˜ฐ๐˜ด๐˜ต๐˜ข



Thus begins your guide to your new onboard toaster oven,

the Intergalactic Chefโ€™s Supreme Machine.

It has four settings: cold, toasty, scalding, and bonfire.

(Iโ€™m afraid that โ€œbonfireโ€ translates to โ€œvolcanoโ€ in some Centaurian dialects.)


Bonfire, a veritable feast, may be used when an interspecies party is held onboard.

Simply insert two pre-cut loaves of bread into the toaster oven

and it will, of course, gleefully produce perfectly toasted bread,

all according to proper xenobiological dietary restrictions.


This device comes equipped with:

melodious music while you overcook delicacies,

microgravity protected multigrain enhancers,

laser activated panini press capabilities,

and, naturally, freshly made French toast.


Spontaneous combustion has, regrettably, occurred

while in eccentric orbits with Mercury in retrograde.

We highly encourage you not to power on your device

until leaving the solar system but, please, purchase

your Cuban bread, Martian loaves (with marmalade),

and Oort Cloud airy ciabatta rolls prior to departure.


We truly hope you will enjoy your toaster oven (patent pending),

and will follow the complicated diagrams of bobs and bits needed for assembly.

(Minor assembly required, do not attempt in an asteroid field.)


Attached we include Terran, Centaurian, and many more exotic recipes

all for your perusal. (We know youโ€™ll simply eat bagels and toast.)

Please enjoy, the robots who made the Intergalactic Chefโ€™s Supreme Machine

will be ever so happy.



Angela Acosta is a bilingual Latina poet and scholar with a passion for the distant future and possible now. She won the 2015 Rhina P. Espaillat Award from West Chester University, and her speculative poetry has or will appear in On Spec, Penumbric, MacroMicroCosm, Radon, and Eye to the Telescope. She is currently completing her Ph.D. in Iberian Studies at The Ohio State University and resides in Columbus, Ohio. She enjoys rock climbing, hiking, and biking.



Speculative fiction & POETRY ZINE
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